A Little More Friday

So today is already shaping up to be one hell of a day.

I've already gotten five phone calls about work, sent a dozen (give or take a couple) emails, and all while actually remaining in the comfort of my own bed. But that might be because it's only 5AM...

And I wonder why I always end up single, right?


Yesterday was wildly entertaining. After reading Photogirl's post on people missing appointments, I happened to spend three hours waiting for someone at an appointment that they set up. They wanted to talk to me about their business with us, and what they could to to improve it (they're already up 20% on the year, so I think "maintain it" would be a better way to put it). Showing up on time would be the first step, asshole...

Then I spent the rest of the day fixing other people's mistakes (my least favorite thing to do in the world), and then stuck in traffic on the I-5 heading home (this happens almost every day).

But there was a reward. A payoff for the agony.

I saw justice happen.


One of the biggest irritants in the world is people who cut in line. It's one of those behaviors that should be universally shunned. People caught doing it should be punished swiftly and without remorse. But unfortunately most people let it go, and have no desire to have a confrontation over something as simple as a line.

But what about when it screws lots of people over?

Yesterday, while driving home, I got into my turn lane early and then waited patiently as the line crept ahead while the green light let five cars through and then turned red. I'm not one of those last minute assholes that everybody hates, who turns on the signal at the front of the line and then thinks that somebody should magically allow them in because their time is so much more important than ours (and if you are one of those people, go fuck yourself). But sure enough, as the line crept forward, some choad in a Lexus decides that he missed the fact that he needs to turn at this light, and puts on his signal right next to me. I was pissed, because I'm 11 cars back, the light has been averaging five cars, and now this asshole thinks that he needs to be first. So I made up my mind. I was going to be that stereotypical jerk in a Mercedes. I could see him relaying the story to his buddies in my head; "Sorry to be late for the gay orgy guys. Some asshole in a Benz wouldn't let me get into the turn lane ahead of him." But I didn't give a shit. He can wait just like everybody else. Then magically, the light to go straight at the intersection turned green, while the light to turn left remained red. Douchebag in a Lexus was holding up the entire road while waiting to cut in line. Surely he would have to go forward and turn around, right?
NOPE! Fucker just sat there holding up the entire road. And the problem is that the lights are based upon pressure sensors in the road. As long as there are cars sitting on the sensors, the light remains green... So people are going around him on the shoulder of the road, all of them giving him the finger. The light to turn left is still red, the light to go straight is still green (because his big heavy car is still sitting on the sensor), and then it got even better. A few cars back I see a cop in my rear view mirror. I know that the cop can't see what's going on, but if enough people go around Lexus boy on the shoulder, he soon will have a clear view of what the hold up is.
One car goes around, then another, and the cop is creeping ever so close with every passing second. Here I am in my car begging God that the idiot next to me does not change his mind about being a dick. COME ON LEXUS BOY, STICK TO YOUR PLAN!!!!

And then in one miraculous moment, the cop sees what the hold up is, and the lights come on.

I have never been so happy in my entire life to see a cop, and I think that I may donate some money to their charity of choice, just because I was so full of joy.

"PULL YOUR VEHICLE TO THE SIDE OF THE ROAD," comes over the speaker as the cop comes up behind the car. So of course the guy pulls over, I'm now 6 cars from the turn (our light turned green, let five cars through, and turned right back to red), and just grinning from ear to ear as I get to watch this cop and idiot interact. I have no clue as to what was said, and I know that the moron probably had an excuse, but the cop got out of his car just looking fucking pissed, and came back with a ticket before the light turned green again.

You know those moments when you say; "God I wish there was a cop around to deal with that asshole," and you never get that reward? Well when you do, it makes it all worth while...


On that note, I'll leave you guys with this. It's just 19 hours away: