Thursday, July 5, 2007

Wrapping It Up

No... Not that...

Get your minds out of the gutter, I mean explaining how the holiday went.



So we are now well past the Independence Day celebrations, and into the aftermath. Fortunately, there was no party at my house, and as a result it DOESN'T look like a third world country fought a civil war in my backyard. My buddy KB is not so fortunate.

So I arrived at the house at 8PM, and everyone was well on their way into having a great time. The keg was tapped, the grill was going, and it was a good time. Then the fireworks...

They had purchased a TON of fireworks, and it was NUTS. Think of the best possible outcome in a situation where you have a bunch of drinking Twentysomething year olds, and fire works. Then imagine the exact opposite of that, but with nobody getting hurt. That's what we had last night. It was crazy. KB's backyard makes Beirut look like Monte Carlo...

Then there were the other consequences of the drinking that went on. These are some memorable gems that I will recall for a long time.

-Everyone thought that they could chug faster than the Beer Rep. THE FOOLS!!!! Nobody could beat me, and I mean not one person. No beer bongs, no sophisticated shotgunning, just 20oz Solo brand plastic cups and lots of them. Chris managed to keep it pretty damn close late in the night, but eventually it got to him. He finished his 9th beer of the evening about a second after I did, losing the race. He started walking to the keg for another, and promptly spewed into the bushes. I will give him credit though, he did his best to puke and rally!

-Beer pong played against my roommate and Gosh does not work when my teammate is HAMMERED at the start of the game. But in all fairness, The Mad Scientist (my roommate) was pretty damn close to lit up, and Gosh was keeping pace with him. We lost by ONE cup. I haven't lost a game of beer pong since O'Sullivan and I got our asses kicked by the really hot Nichole, probably 6 months ago... And I think that she distracted me with her hotness, because O'Sullivan was D-RUNK and I was doing my best to defeat her one on one. (Hahahahaha, which makes me remember the time he fell into the beer pong table and COVERED his shirt in beer. The solution that fit best at that moment: ditch the shirt. And the result is that a distinct majority of the photos from that party are of him without a shirt on... Ridiculous)

-Wednesday I went to work the morning of the party at 4:30AM to be done early, and ended up being their until 2:30PM. I came home, took a nap, and was up at 7PM. I went to the party and brought 30 hamburgers, to go with the hot dogs, chicken, brats, and Polish sausage that was already there. I ate nothing at the party and ended up having half a burger from Jack in the Box at 2AM. The last time that I had food having been 6PM on Tuesday night, I was still not hungry enough to like the food at Jack in the Box...

Last but not least:

-If you throw a party at your house, it's best to make sure that the people that you invite know where the bathrooms are. It eliminates a lot of confusion and speeds up the whole "line" thing. EVEN MORE IMPORTANT, make sure that if you direct a drunk person to the bathroom, you visually confirm that they make it there...
Because if you don't and they are really drunk, a closet door and a bathroom door look the same.

4 comments:

Steph said...

I suggest hiring port-a-potty's. Drunk men have trouble finding the bowl and there is nothing worse than cleaning up some drunk dudes pee!!

Princess Banter said...

Awwwww would've loved to snag an invite to that banging party haha! Sounded like one of those awesome college parties ;)

Cazzie!!! said...

Hmmm, and glass sliding doors just don't look like they are there AT ALL do they? LOL

Me Myself and I said...

OH, I am feeling sick just reading about all the beer guzzling. Sounds like you're a bit of a rock star in that department!