Friday, May 25, 2007

That Guy (Part 3)

So this is the third in a series of posts about "That Guy." TG can be any one of a number of people. Perhaps you work with him, live by him, or see him socially. But he's just that guy that you happen to be this close to slapping the shit out of, and he has no fucking clue. He thinks that he's everyone's friend, when in fact he's everyone's worst enemy.

That past two in this series have been about someone that I work with. Someone whom I have felt the need to stab in the temple with a ball point pen on numerous occasions, and the only thing keeping him alive are the various "legal issues," and the whole "killing someone is immoral" thing. If it weren't for those qualms I would have offed this MF'er an age and a half ago. The crazy thing is that when I started working with him we were friends, but he has worked his way to the dark side in a short period of time. And don't get me wrong, he has his redeeming moments were he helps out, but they're a bit rare. The "throw cyanide in his coffee" moments are a lot more common.


This post has nothing to do with that TG, but another one that keep rearing his ugly head...


I FUCKING HATE EVERY SON-OF-A-BITCH THAT DOES NOT GET THE CONCEPT OF A LINE WHEN DRIVING.

These SOB's will see a back up of cars for an exit that's a mile and a half long, and work their way up to the last stretch of road before the exit. Then they put on their blinker like they just now realized that they need to get off the highway, and force their way over.

MOTHERFUCKERS... Get to the back of the fucking Queue. Throw that fucking car in reverse, and wait your fucking turn like the rest of us, you inconsiderate piece of self absorbed monkey shit. We've been doing what we have been taught since the first grade and being patient for those that were before us. Then this MF'er shows up as if he's royalty, and pushes his way into the line. I thing that it should seriously be a ticketable offense. Fuck speeders, at least we're keeping traffic moving. Ticket the assholes that generate back ups in multiple lanes by racing to the front of the line, and then slowing to 5MPH (8KmPH for my non-US readers) to cut their way in. These cocksuckers are slowing up THOUSANDS of people each day in the Seattle area alone.


And you can say to me all day: "Stormin, what about the honest people that didn't know they needed to exit, but they realized it and they need to get off the freeway?" Fine, one free pass (the cops pull up your record with your drivers license), and then a $50 fine each time. They would make the revenues from speeding look like couch change. And That Guy, the motherfucker doing this once a day if not more? That fucking guy would learn quick that a line at your exit means get the fuck in it, or keep fucking driving. Or he'd be a broke as MF'er something QUICK...

So, as always, FUCK That Guy.

Stormin OUT...

PS: This is calling out a friend. So fuck him and his driving, even if he is a great guy... ;-) (I know that; "Thissss isss the way you liiivvvveeee.")

PPSS: And another thing. People in nice cars need to stop this shit right quick, and in a hurry. I know that the BMW drivers can't help it {their head was lodged firmly up their ass the moment that they bought the car :-)...}, but everyone in a Benz doing it is making me look bad. You own a nice car people, not the entire road.

PPPSSS: That said, people going the speed limit in the far left lane can suck my left nut, and then the right one, and then the left again... I bought a Mercedes to drive recklessly and act like I own the road... Just not the lines for the exits. :-) (J/K)

2 comments:

Malnurtured Snay said...

GAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

I hate those lane jumpers. I generally refuse to let them in front of me, I mean -- what are they going to do, hit me? Cool, I'll sue :)

Eve said...

Yeah, seriously. Jerks. But it did kind of happen to me today. *blush* But don't forget the rules of the road: everyone else is either an idiot or an asshole, just not me.