Monday, November 5, 2007

Day Five

So, I have so many issues to blog about that I am having serious issues segregating them into separate, coherent, meaningful (maybe?) posts for the blog. And with NaBloPoMo in full swing, I may need to make sure that these things last...

Today's selection from the insanity? THAT GUY at the office, and his rants about conspiracies. And yes, it is THAT SAME F'ING GUY... Now he knows more about the world than anybody else, and has discovered every evil plot currently in existence.

Today's Conspiracy: The Freemasons are trying to take over the world, and have buried their symbols into our culture in a effort to make this more acceptable.

The one that set me off about this one today was someone ranting to me (and this is someone that I work with) about the symbols on the dollar bill being Masonic symbols. The one that set him off was the massive amounts of "thirteens" on the dollar bill. Thirteen arrows in one of the eagles feet, thirteen leaves (and olives) on the olive branch in the other, thirteen layers in the unfinished pyramid, thirteen stripes on the shield, and thirteen stars above the eagle... He kept going on, there are more that I can't recall.

-Confession One- I'm a Freemason.

-Confession Two- I am trying to take over the world.

-Confession Three- Just because I am doing my best to take over the world, it does not mean that every other Freemason is in on it. The organization is about brotherhood, and community. If you need an organization that is doing their best to rule the world, look HERE. (And yes, that link's color is intentional...)

-Confession Four- When I used my time machine to go back into history and investigate these theories before lunch, I found one very common fact about the number 13 that had nothing to do with the Freemasons. Our country had 13 colonies that united to form ONE country. One republic from thirteen independent entities. Perhaps the commonality the 13's on our currency all share happens to have more to do with that, than a diabolical plan to take over the world... I would find the small pentagram hidden in the top right corner of the front of the dollar bill to be far more concerning.


So in closing, the Freemasons are not trying to take over the world by hiding symbols in currency and sponsoring the production of delightful movies with Nicholas Cage...


And there is no pentagram on the dollar bill either. But I bet you all planned on looking, didn't ya?

9 comments:

Trundling Grunt said...

Sorry, but I'm not fooled. P&G are trying to do all that - my Amway distributor told me, so it must be true.

A Novelist said...

I can't stand people who constantly try and 'one up you' all the time. I have someone at my office who does this to me. So annoying. Your post about him made me laugh out loud. Where does he come up with his nonsense? Anyway, I can totally relate... :)

Eve said...

Hahaha. That Guy and the other conspiracy theorists. Pretty dumb.

WiscoBlonde said...

I'm plotting to take over the world....and I'm not even a Mason!!!

The Stormin Mormon said...

TG: Proctor & Gamble already control the world... We're trying to take it from them.

Nov: I swear, there is That Guy at every job. And if anyone says that they don't have That Guy at work, then they must be That Guy.

Eve: Morons... If someone was trying to take over the world, their plan should take less than 25 years.

WB: Stop telling everyone about our plan... It's supposed to be a secret!!!!! ;-)

Peter said...

What if someone was trying to take over the Free Masons?

Wendy said...

hahaha! When you kept saying thirteen this and that, I kept thinking, uh duh, thirteen colonies.

People are smarterest.

cadiz12 said...

i hate "that guy."

when you take over the world, will the new currency have your face on it?

The Stormin Mormon said...

PdW: Who, the UAW? ;-)

Wendy: As he was ranting the same thought ran through my mind. Apparently that explanation is "to conveniant" for him...

Cadiz: Actually I am thinking of going to polymer currency like the Aussies did, with images recalling various achievements of mine on each denomination. Summiting Everest - $1, Walking On The Moon -$2, Winning The Stanley Cup -$5, and so on...
And yes, I am bringing back the two dollar bill. I like it. It's easier than carrying two ones.